Apathy

I'm not quite there, but I'm kind of in that place where everything feels fuzzy. I found out that I didn't get shortlisted for the two jobs for which I had a phone interview the other week. I'm attempting, very poorly, to cram a few months worth of studying into a day. It's not going well.

So basically, I'm staring a lot of rejection in the face right now. I was upset about it earlier, and I'm pretty sure I'll actually be upset tomorrow when I fail my exam (if I fail, if). But right now...I kind of don't give a crap. I just want to go to bed and wake up in February.

I am, however, studying because hope springs eternal, and if I don't study, I will definitely fail. So I have to try. But I don't fail things. I just don't - I've always been able to pull it out by working hard at something. But unfortunately, work has required all the working hard I have, not to mention the trip. Therefore, I may fall flat on my ass tomorrow, at which point I will then have to get up and try to do all the work I have to do before we leave. Which is too much for me to keep up with, but since everyone at work is in the same boat, there are not many people to take up the slack.

How do you spell "burnout"?

M-A-N-D-Y!

(That is, apparently, also how you spell "whiny", but I think some of you already knew that.)